Program Overview, in depth
The Manuscript
Five chapters and a preface. Each chapter makes an argument. The workpaper it pairs with turns that argument into something a household fills in.
The framework borrows its vocabulary from signal processing and accounting because those fields already have precise words for things households experience vaguely: drift, saturation, an unbilled cost. The metaphors are descriptive tools, not claims about physiology or physics.
Why we get out of tune
LiveSeparates the message from its carrier: what is being said, and the tone carrying it. Most household conflict isn't a disagreement about content. It's two people sending on frequencies the other can't receive, and hearing static where a message was meant.
Pairs with: WP-09, Say it so it lands · Free to read on the site
Is the split working?
LiveThe case for scoring an arrangement rather than a person, and the arithmetic that does it. Defines the three inputs the calculator reads and states plainly what the resulting number can and cannot support.
Pairs with: CALC-01, Is the setup working for everyone? · Free to read on the site
Full tanks and different angles
LiveHow much of a reaction was already present before the conversation started, and which point of view each person is arguing from. Separates "how much am I carrying" from "how upset am I about this specific thing." Those two questions feel identical in the moment but need different answers.
Pairs with: WP-02, How much are you carrying? · WP-11, the Calm-Down Kit
Two kinds of fair
LiveWhy most chore arguments are really arguments about what's fair, dressed up as arguments about dishes. Two people apply different ideas of what a fair share means, and neither has said which idea they hold. Its second half covers what gets filtered out before it reaches attention, and why one person genuinely doesn't see what the other cannot stop seeing.
Pairs with: WP-03, One owner per job
The monthly look-back
LiveWhy you need a monthly look-back on top of the weekly check-ins. Some patterns are invisible week to week and only come into focus when four weeks are laid side by side. A recurring gap usually turns out to be structural rather than a run of bad weeks.
Pairs with: WP-04, What keeps coming back?
The Signal Layer
The tools that deal with how things are said and when, rather than with workload. All four are built.
90-second daily check-in
LiveA ninety-second daily check-in (load, appreciation, friction, ask) with no debate, no problem-solving and no rebuttal. It is named after an electronic circuit that keeps two signals in step through constant small corrections rather than occasional big ones. That is also the argument: a minute a day prevents most of what becomes a Saturday-afternoon fight.
Status: built, in the PDF bundle, and the one habit intended to outlive the rest of the system
Carrier Frequency Audit
LiveMaps mismatched pace: one person is moving fast, the other is at the end of their capacity and moving slowly, and the conversation produces noise neither of them meant. A difference in tempo, not in willingness. Each person marks their speed, talk and urgency for five everyday moments; the biggest gap gets one small agreement.
Status: built, as Same moment, different speeds, with a fill-in version
Static Dampening Log
LiveSeparates outside pressure (money, work, illness, broken sleep) from friction that actually originates between two people, so that environmental strain stops being attributed to the other person by default. A one-week evening log, read together at the end of the week, ending in one plan for the pressure.
Status: built, as Is it us, or is it everything else?, with a fill-in version
Harmonic Resonance & Entrainment
LiveLong-cycle calibration: the shared touchpoints that keep two people in step across years rather than weeks, and what to do when they've quietly lapsed. Every three months or so: which rituals are alive, fading or stopped, and one to restart.
Status: built, as Keep your little rituals alive, with a fill-in version
How They Connect
Four workpapers produce numbers. The rest don't, on purpose. Not everything worth doing is worth scoring.
| Instrument | Reads from | Produces | Feeds |
|---|---|---|---|
| WP-01 | Ch. V | Workload balance | CALC-01 |
| WP-02 | Ch. III | Leftover stress | CALC-01 |
| WP-03 | Ch. IV | Ownership clarity | CALC-01 |
| WP-09 | Ch. I | Retuning frequency | Overall score only |
| WP-04 | Ch. V | — | Amendments to WP-03 |
| WP-11 | Ch. III | — | Gates WP-03 and WP-09 |
| WP-13 | Ch. I | — | Promotes items to WP-03 or WP-09 |
| WP-12 | Ch. I | — | Agreements; jobs that keep coming up go to WP-03 |
| WP-14 | Ch. III | — | A plan for outside pressure; “between us” items go to WP-09 |
| WP-15 | — | — | One ritual to restart; organising jobs go to WP-03 |
| CALC-01 | Ch. II | Setup score, overall score | The weekly closing |
| REPORT-01 | All of the above | Cross-instrument findings | Your own ledger file |
What none of this will ever take as an input: tone of voice, recordings, message sentiment, response timestamps, or anything describing one person without their direct participation in entering it. No score is ever computed from one person's inputs alone.
None of it is a validated clinical or statistical instrument. Nothing here was trained on data and nothing predicts an outcome. If a number is ever used to end a conversation rather than start one, it is being misused.
What Comes Next
Everything that has been designed is now built, including CALC-02, Look back over 30 days. More may follow; each is added the day it is finished.
For counts rather than descriptions, see the Rollout Status. For what each built tool does and when to reach for it, see the Suite Index. Nothing here has a date.