For groups
Leading a group: a six-session guide
A free guide for anyone leading a small group about relationships: a church small group, a couples’ class, a community group, or a few friends around a kitchen table. Six sessions of about an hour, each with an outline, discussion questions and a one-page handout to print. Nobody needs to sign up for anything.
How to use this guide
Who it’s for. Mixed groups: couples and people who come on their own, younger and older, people of faith and people without one. The ideas are plain and practical, and they sit comfortably alongside your own tradition. Every activity can be done alone, thinking of a partner, a friend, a parent or a grown child, so nobody is left out.
About 60 minutes a session. A simple shape that works:
- Welcome, and the ground rules: 5 minutes
- Opening question: 10 minutes
- Read together: 5 minutes
- Try it: 15 minutes
- Discussion: 20 minutes
- Take home: 5 minutes
You won’t get through every question, and you don’t need to. Pick the two or three that fit your group.
What you need. This page on a phone or tablet, pens and paper, and a printer if you have one (optional). You can also show a handout on a screen, or send people the link. To show a page on a projector or a TV, add ?work=1 to the end of any link on this site (for example, spreadloveandacceptance.com/groups.html?work=1). You get the plain version, with no cartoons.
Teaching a class? Every handout has a short Teens version with school examples, and For teachers collects the best pages for a lesson, with projector tips and what you may print and share.
The handouts. Each session has a one-page handout with three key ideas, the discussion questions and one small practice for the week. Hand it out at the end, so people can take the practice home. Use Print all handouts for the whole series, or Print this handout under any session. To print just the outline of one session for yourself, use Print this session (leader copy).
The six sessions.
- Turning toward the small moments
- Weekly check-ins: hear it back before you answer
- Love languages as a menu
- Repair: saying sorry so it lands
- When it gets heated: pause, settle, come back
- Your circle of control, and sharing the load
The order builds gently, from small everyday moments to harder ones, but each session also stands on its own.
Before you start: keeping the group safe
Read these ground rules aloud at the first session, and remind people briefly each week.
- No one has to share. Listening is taking part.
- Talk about yourself, not your partner. Say “I” and “me.” Nobody is here to be talked about.
- What’s said here stays here. Stories belong to the people who told them.
- Passing is always fine. “Pass” is a full answer, and nobody asks why.
A short note to read out
“The ideas in this series are for two people who are both safe. If anyone here is afraid of a partner, please don’t try these at home. They aren’t made for that, and it isn’t your fault. There is a page on the site called Not safe at home?, and in the US the National Domestic Violence Hotline is free and open any time: call 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. In the UK, the National Domestic Abuse Helpline is free and open any time on 0808 2000 247.”
On the site: Not safe at home? · US: call 1-800-799-7233 or text START to 88788 · UK: National Domestic Abuse Helpline 0808 2000 247 · UK, under 19: Childline 0800 1111 · UK, struggling to cope: Samaritans 116 123 · Elsewhere: findahelpline.com
A few tips for leaders:
- Don’t ask couples who are in conflict to work together in front of the group. Offer the “on your own” version of each activity to everyone, so nobody has to explain why they chose it.
- Keep practice topics small and outside the relationship: a late bus, a noisy neighbor. Big topics belong at home, at a calm time.
- If someone shares something painful, thank them, don’t try to fix it, and check in with them privately afterwards.
- If someone tells you they are afraid at home, listen and believe them. Point them to Not safe at home? and the hotline, rather than to the tools here.
- You are a host, not a counselor. It helps to know a local counselor or pastor you can suggest when something needs more than a group.
When you’re worried about a couple
Sometimes you notice something: one person looks afraid, checks with their partner before they speak, or is never allowed to come alone. If that happens:
- Talk to the person alone, in private. A quiet “How are things at home?” at a moment when their partner is not nearby. Never raise it in front of their partner.
- Don’t confront the partner you are worried about. It can make things more dangerous for the person at home.
- Skip couples exercises for them. Couples activities and couples counseling are not advised where one person controls the other. Offer everyone the “on your own” version, so nobody has to explain.
- Keep the hotline number with you: 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. In the UK: the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (free, any time), or Childline on 0800 1111 if you are under 19. Anywhere else: findahelpline.com.
- Know a local domestic violence advocate before you need one. The hotline can tell you who is near you.
Session 1: Turning toward the small moments
Goal: Notice the small ways people reach for each other, and answer more of them.
Opening question 10 minutes
Think of a small, ordinary moment when someone made you feel noticed. What did they do? Go around the room. Anyone can pass.
Read together 5 minutes
Feeling close is built mostly in tiny, everyday moments, not in big talks or special dates. A “look at this,” a sigh, a joke, a “guess what happened today”: each one is a small reach for attention. Turning toward means noticing it and answering, even for ten seconds. If you really can’t right now, say when you can: “Give me two minutes, then I want to hear.”
On the site: Turning Toward: notice when they reach for you · Say thank you, specifically
Try it 15 minutes
Small reaches, spotted. On your own, write down five small ways people reach for you on an ordinary day, at home, at work or with friends. Next to each, write how you usually answer: you look up, you half-answer, or you miss it. Circle one you would like to answer better.
Couples: write your lists separately, then swap and read. The only reply allowed is “Thank you for telling me.” Then each of you says one specific thank-you to the other: “Thanks for ___. I noticed ___.”
Back in the group: anyone who wants to can share one word about what they noticed. Passing is fine.
Discussion questions 20 minutes
- Which small reaches are easiest for you to miss? At what time of day?
- What gets in the way of turning toward: phones, tiredness, work, worry?
- Why might a specific thank-you land better than “thanks for everything”?
- When you share good news, what helps you feel the other person is truly glad for you?
- What small ritual (a hello, a goodbye, a weekly walk or call) has kept one of your relationships steady?
- Which of these is easiest to let slide when things are going fine?
Take home 5 minutes
Each day this week, catch one small “look at this” and turn toward it. Once this week, thank someone for one specific thing, and tell them what it meant to you.
Session 2: Weekly check-ins: hear it back before you answer
Goal: Practice a short, kind check-in on one small topic, where each person is heard before anyone answers.
Opening question 10 minutes
When do you feel most listened to? What does the other person do? Go around the room. Anyone can pass.
Read together 5 minutes
A check-in is a short, agreed talk about one topic, at a time that works for both people. Start on the same side: “I am not against you. I want to sort out this one thing.” One person says one fact and how it landed. The other says back what they heard and asks, “Did I get that?” Then you swap. Clearing things up waits until you have both been heard.
On the site: Check-ins: hear it back before you answer · One topic, and you’re on the same side
Try it 15 minutes
Say it back. Work in pairs on a small topic that is not about your relationship: a slow queue, a late bus, a noisy neighbor. The speaker takes one minute: one fact, and how it landed. The listener says, “What I heard is … did I get that?” The speaker corrects anything that was missed. Then swap.
Couples can pair together on a light topic, or each pair with someone else. If you came on your own, pair with anyone, or work as a three and take turns listening.
Back in the group: what was it like to be heard back? What was hard about listening without planning your answer?
Discussion questions 20 minutes
- What was it like to hear your own words said back to you?
- Was it hard to listen without planning your answer? What helped?
- Why might timing matter as much as the topic? Think of a talk started at 10:50 p.m.
- What helps you stay on the same side when you disagree with someone you love?
- How could a check-in work with a friend, a parent, a grown child or a coworker?
- What would make a regular check-in feel like care rather than a meeting?
Take home 5 minutes
Ask someone for twenty minutes at a set time this week, for one small topic. Use the order: one fact and how it landed, say it back, “Did I get that?”, then swap.
Session 3: Love languages as a menu
Goal: Learn what makes each person feel cared for, by asking about real moments rather than labels.
Opening question 10 minutes
What is one small thing someone did that made you feel cared for, recently or long ago? Go around the room. Anyone can pass.
Read together 5 minutes
People feel cared for in different ways. The five love languages (words, acts of service, gifts, quality time and touch) are a friendly way to start that conversation. Researchers who have tested them found that most people value all five and that they don’t sort people into neat types, so treat them as a menu, not a label. Ask what lands best this month, and expect the answer to change.
On the site: Love languages: how to practice · An honest word about the evidence
Try it 15 minutes
Three moments. On your own, write down three times you felt most cared for. Real moments, not categories. Then look at them together: what do they have in common?
Couples: take turns sharing your three moments, and listen to all of it before saying anything. Then each of you picks one thing from the menu that would feel good right now. If you came on your own, think of someone close to you: how might they answer? What would you ask them?
Back in the group: anyone who wants to can say what their moments had in common.
Discussion questions 20 minutes
- What did your three moments have in common? Did anything surprise you?
- How do you most often show care? Is it the same way you like to receive it?
- Have you ever given care that didn’t land? What happened?
- How can a love language go sideways, like keeping score, or a gift in place of a change?
- How might what you need change in a hard season, like a new baby, an illness or a busy month?
- What is a gentle way to ask someone what makes them feel cared for?
Take home 5 minutes
Ask one person: “What made you feel most cared for this week?” Listen to the whole answer, and write down the moment, not the category. Then offer one thing from their menu.
Session 4: Repair: saying sorry so it lands
Goal: Understand the parts of a good apology, and learn to ask what someone needs after a hurt.
Opening question 10 minutes
Without naming anyone, think of an apology that really helped you. What made it work? Go around the room. Anyone can pass.
Read together 5 minutes
After a hurt, people need different parts of a sorry: regret (“I’m sorry”), responsibility (“That was mine”), repair (“What can I do to fix it?”), change (“Here is what I’ll do differently”), and asking to be forgiven, with no rush. In studies of what makes an apology work, owning your part and offering to repair were among the parts people rated most important. So ask, on a calm day, which part helps most.
On the site: Apology languages: how to practice · Accepting responsibility
Try it 15 minutes
A three-part sorry. On your own, pick one small thing you owe an apology for: a forgotten errand, a sharp word. Keep it small, and nothing you would mind others knowing. Write it in three parts: what happened, that it was yours, and one thing you’ll do. No one has to share it.
Couples: tell each other, “When I’ve upset you, what helps most: hearing sorry, hearing that I understand, or seeing it put right?” This is a calm-day question. Don’t use the time to go back over a hurt that is still open.
Back in the group: which part of a sorry was easiest to write? Which was hardest?
Discussion questions 20 minutes
- Which part of a sorry matters most to you: regret, responsibility, repair, change, or being asked to forgive?
- What turns an apology into a non-apology? Think of “Sorry you feel that way” or “I only did it because you…”.
- Why might a long explanation start to feel like a defence?
- How is “not yet” different from “no” when someone asks to be forgiven?
- Is it different with a friend, a parent or a coworker? How?
- What have you learned about forgiveness, from your family, your faith or your own life? What helps, and what feels like pressure?
Take home 5 minutes
On a calm day, ask someone: “When I’ve upset you, what helps most?” Tell them yours. If you owe a small apology, offer it in three parts, then ask: “Did that cover it?”
An apology is not a fix for someone who keeps hurting you, or who uses “sorry” to end your say. If that is happening, see Not safe at home?
Session 5: When it gets heated: pause, settle, come back
Goal: Have a plan for heated moments: a pause line with a return time, time to settle, and a fresh start.
Opening question 10 minutes
When you get upset, what happens in your body first: a hot face, a tight chest, going quiet, talking fast? Go around the room. Anyone can pass.
Read together 5 minutes
Whoever feels it first says the pause line, and also says when: “I want to get this right and I’m too worked up. Can we pick this up at eight?” Breathe out longer than you breathe in. Move apart for twenty minutes or more, and don’t rehearse the argument. Then come back on time, because that is what makes the pause safe for the other person: “I’m back. The topic is still the sink. I am not against you.”
On the site: Upset right now? Five minutes for two people · A pause is fine. Come back to the same topic · How to stop fighting: seven calm steps
Try it 15 minutes
Your own pause plan. This is done on your own. Nobody acts out a real argument. Write three things: your pause line, in your own words, with a return time; what you’ll do while you wait (walk, drink water, wash your face); and your come-back line.
Breathe together. The leader counts for one minute: in for 4, out for 6. Or open the pacer on Upset right now? and follow it as a group.
Couples: agree on one pause line you would both accept. Now, while things are calm, is the best time to choose it.
Discussion questions 20 minutes
- How is a pause with a return time different from walking away?
- What helps your body settle? What makes it worse?
- Why does coming back on time matter so much?
- “The topic is still the sink. I am not against you.” Why might naming the topic and the side help?
- What tells you a talk is going sideways: a voice going up, someone going quiet, something else?
- How could a pause work with a teenager, a parent or a coworker?
Take home 5 minutes
On a calm day, agree a pause line with someone at home, including a return time. Practice the breathing once a day: in for 4, out for 6, for one minute.
This is for two people who are both safe and both upset. If one person is afraid of the other, a pause line is not the answer. See Not safe at home?
Session 6: Your circle of control, and sharing the load
Goal: Put your energy where it can help, match care and effort (never volume), and make the invisible work at home visible.
Opening question 10 minutes
What is one job you do that nobody sees, at home, at work, in your family or in your community? Go around the room. Anyone can pass.
Read together 5 minutes
Every moment has three rings. In the middle is what you control: your words, your effort, your tone, your rest and what you ask for. Around it is what you can influence: you can ask and offer, and the other person still chooses. Outside is what isn’t yours: their mood, their pace, whether they agree. Matching energy means matching care and effort, never volume or meanness: if someone gets loud, you don’t have to get loud.
At home, much of the effort is invisible: the noticing, remembering, planning and checking. Making it visible, then giving each job one owner, is kinder than arguing about who does more.
The circle of control, in short. Most tiredness comes from pouring energy into the outer ring. Your energy is a budget, and quiet resentment or a silent scorecard are signs you are giving more than you have. To match energy kindly: notice the pattern, name it once without blame, adjust your own side, and see what comes back. If you are afraid of someone, none of this applies; see Not safe at home?
On the site: Your circle of control, and matching energy · Invisible labor: everyday examples · Share the load, step by step · The free printable chore chart
Try it 15 minutes
Three rings (5 minutes, on your own). Draw three circles, one inside the other. Write what is weighing on you this week in the right ring: in your hands, yours to influence, or not yours. Notice where most of your energy is going.
The thinking jobs (10 minutes). Pick one household job, like groceries, birthdays or school forms, and write every step, including the noticing, remembering, planning and checking. Couples: each write the jobs you carry, then pick the three that cause the most friction to talk about at home, at a calm time, not here. If you came on your own, do it for your family, your roommates, or a team or volunteer group you belong to.
Discussion questions 20 minutes
- Which ring takes most of your energy? Which ring do you wish it went to?
- “Match care and effort, never volume.” What does that look like when someone is loud, or going through a hard time?
- When is it right to give more than you get for a season? How do you know it is still a choice?
Leader note: this question could land badly for someone who is being controlled at home. If you are unsure about anyone in the room, skip it. - Which invisible jobs surprised you when you wrote out every step?
- Why might “I do most of the work” and “But I help a lot” both be true?
- Looking back over the six sessions, which small practice do you want to keep?
Take home 5 minutes
Write down the three household jobs that cause the most friction, with every step of each. Talk them over at a calm time, and agree one owner per job, start to finish, thinking part included.
Printable handouts
One page per session. Each one prints on its own sheet, without the rest of this page.
Leading a group · Session 1 of 6
Turning toward the small moments
Notice the small ways people reach for each other, and answer more of them.
Three key ideas
- Closeness is built in small, ordinary moments, not only in big talks.
- A “look at this,” a sigh or a joke is a small reach for attention. Notice it and answer, even for ten seconds. If you can’t right now, say when you can.
- Specific thanks shows you noticed: “Thanks for handling the school forms. I know that ate your lunch break.”
Talk it over
- Which small reaches are easiest for you to miss? At what time of day?
- What gets in the way of turning toward: phones, tiredness, work, worry?
- Why might a specific thank-you land better than “thanks for everything”?
- When you share good news, what helps you feel the other person is truly glad for you?
- What small ritual (a hello, a goodbye, a weekly walk or call) has kept one of your relationships steady?
- Which of these is easiest to let slide when things are going fine?
Try this week
Each day this week, catch one small “look at this” and turn toward it. Once this week, thank someone for one specific thing, and tell them what it meant to you.
Teens version
At school, a small reach might be a friend showing you a video at break, or a classmate sighing “this test is killing me.” Turning toward can take ten seconds: “Ha, show me,” or “Same. Want to revise together?” Thank one classmate or teacher for one specific thing.
No one has to share, and passing is always fine. These ideas are for people who are safe with each other. If you are afraid of a partner or of someone at home, see spreadloveandacceptance.com/safety.html. In the US, call 1-800-799-7233 (text START to 88788). In the UK, call the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (free, any time). If you are under 19, Childline is on 0800 1111. If you are struggling to cope, Samaritans is on 116 123. Anywhere else: findahelpline.com.
Free, no sign-up: spreadloveandacceptance.com/groups.html#session-1
Leading a group · Session 2 of 6
Weekly check-ins: hear it back before you answer
Practice a short, kind check-in on one small topic, where each person is heard before anyone answers.
Three key ideas
- One topic, at a time you both agreed on. Phones down, nobody hungry or running on empty.
- Start on the same side: “I am not against you. I want to sort out this one thing.”
- Hear it back before you answer: “What I heard is … did I get that?” Then swap.
Talk it over
- What was it like to hear your own words said back to you?
- Was it hard to listen without planning your answer? What helped?
- Why might timing matter as much as the topic? Think of a talk started at 10:50 p.m.
- What helps you stay on the same side when you disagree with someone you love?
- How could a check-in work with a friend, a parent, a grown child or a coworker?
- What would make a regular check-in feel like care rather than a meeting?
Try this week
Ask someone for twenty minutes at a set time this week, for one small topic. Use the order: one fact and how it landed, say it back, “Did I get that?”, then swap.
Teens version
Try it with a friend, a parent or your group-project partner, on one small topic, like who does which part of the project. Say back what you heard before you answer: “So you’d rather do the slides than the write-up. Did I get that?”
No one has to share, and passing is always fine. These ideas are for people who are safe with each other. If you are afraid of a partner or of someone at home, see spreadloveandacceptance.com/safety.html. In the US, call 1-800-799-7233 (text START to 88788). In the UK, call the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (free, any time). If you are under 19, Childline is on 0800 1111. If you are struggling to cope, Samaritans is on 116 123. Anywhere else: findahelpline.com.
Free, no sign-up: spreadloveandacceptance.com/groups.html#session-2
Leading a group · Session 3 of 6
Love languages as a menu
Learn what makes each person feel cared for, by asking about real moments rather than labels.
Three key ideas
- People feel cared for in different ways: words, acts of service, gifts, quality time and touch.
- A menu, not a label. Most people value all five, and what lands can change from month to month.
- Ask about real moments, not categories. Check, don’t guess.
Talk it over
- What did your three moments have in common? Did anything surprise you?
- How do you most often show care? Is it the same way you like to receive it?
- Have you ever given care that didn’t land? What happened?
- How can a love language go sideways, like keeping score, or a gift in place of a change?
- How might what you need change in a hard season, like a new baby, an illness or a busy month?
- What is a gentle way to ask someone what makes them feel cared for?
Try this week
Ask one person: “What made you feel most cared for this week?” Listen to the whole answer, and write down the moment, not the category. Then offer one thing from their menu.
Teens version
With friends, care can look like saving someone a seat, lending a charger, sending a funny message on a bad day or turning up to their match. Ask a friend or someone at home: “What made you feel looked after this week?”
No one has to share, and passing is always fine. These ideas are for people who are safe with each other. If you are afraid of a partner or of someone at home, see spreadloveandacceptance.com/safety.html. In the US, call 1-800-799-7233 (text START to 88788). In the UK, call the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (free, any time). If you are under 19, Childline is on 0800 1111. If you are struggling to cope, Samaritans is on 116 123. Anywhere else: findahelpline.com.
Free, no sign-up: spreadloveandacceptance.com/groups.html#session-3
Leading a group · Session 4 of 6
Repair: saying sorry so it lands
Understand the parts of a good apology, and learn to ask what someone needs after a hurt.
Three key ideas
- Most good apologies include regret, responsibility and repair. Add a change and asking to be forgiven as they fit.
- Own your part without a “but.” Explain only if you are asked, and keep it brief.
- Ask before you need it, and check after: “Did that cover it, or is there a part I missed?”
Talk it over
- Which part of a sorry matters most to you: regret, responsibility, repair, change, or being asked to forgive?
- What turns an apology into a non-apology? Think of “Sorry you feel that way” or “I only did it because you…”.
- Why might a long explanation start to feel like a defence?
- How is “not yet” different from “no” when someone asks to be forgiven?
- Is it different with a friend, a parent or a coworker? How?
- What have you learned about forgiveness, from your family, your faith or your own life? What helps, and what feels like pressure?
Try this week
On a calm day, ask someone: “When I’ve upset you, what helps most?” Tell them yours. If you owe a small apology, offer it in three parts, then ask: “Did that cover it?”
Teens version
If something you said in a group chat hurt someone, a good sorry names it, owns it without a “but,” and offers a fix: “I’m sorry I posted that photo. It wasn’t fair to you. I’ve taken it down.” Then ask: “Is there anything else I can do?”
No one has to share, and passing is always fine. These ideas are for people who are safe with each other. If you are afraid of a partner or of someone at home, see spreadloveandacceptance.com/safety.html. In the US, call 1-800-799-7233 (text START to 88788). In the UK, call the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (free, any time). If you are under 19, Childline is on 0800 1111. If you are struggling to cope, Samaritans is on 116 123. Anywhere else: findahelpline.com.
Free, no sign-up: spreadloveandacceptance.com/groups.html#session-4
Leading a group · Session 5 of 6
When it gets heated: pause, settle, come back
Have a plan for heated moments: a pause line with a return time, time to settle, and a fresh start.
Three key ideas
- Whoever feels it first says the pause line, with a return time.
- Settle your body: breathe out longer than you breathe in, and move apart for twenty minutes or more.
- Come back on time, to the same topic, on the same side. Say back what you heard before you say yours.
Talk it over
- How is a pause with a return time different from walking away?
- What helps your body settle? What makes it worse?
- Why does coming back on time matter so much?
- “The topic is still the sink. I am not against you.” Why might naming the topic and the side help?
- What tells you a talk is going sideways: a voice going up, someone going quiet, something else?
- How could a pause work with a teenager, a parent or a coworker?
Try this week
On a calm day, agree a pause line with someone at home, including a return time. Practice the breathing once a day: in for 4, out for 6, for one minute.
Teens version
With a parent, a sibling or a teacher, a pause line could be: “I’m too wound up to talk well right now. Can we finish this after dinner?” Then come back when you said you would, and start with what you heard them say.
No one has to share, and passing is always fine. These ideas are for people who are safe with each other. If you are afraid of a partner or of someone at home, see spreadloveandacceptance.com/safety.html. In the US, call 1-800-799-7233 (text START to 88788). In the UK, call the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (free, any time). If you are under 19, Childline is on 0800 1111. If you are struggling to cope, Samaritans is on 116 123. Anywhere else: findahelpline.com.
Free, no sign-up: spreadloveandacceptance.com/groups.html#session-5
Leading a group · Session 6 of 6
Your circle of control, and sharing the load
Put your energy where it can help, match care and effort (never volume), and make the invisible work at home visible.
Three key ideas
- Three rings: what you control, what you can influence, and what isn’t yours. Spend your energy in the middle.
- Match care and effort, never volume or meanness. With children and anyone who depends on you, give what they need.
- Make the invisible work visible, then give each job one owner, start to finish.
Talk it over
- Which ring takes most of your energy? Which ring do you wish it went to?
- “Match care and effort, never volume.” What does that look like when someone is loud, or going through a hard time?
- When is it right to give more than you get for a season? How do you know it is still a choice?
- Which invisible jobs surprised you when you wrote out every step?
- Why might “I do most of the work” and “But I help a lot” both be true?
- Looking back over the six sessions, which small practice do you want to keep?
Try this week
Write down the three household jobs that cause the most friction, with every step of each. Talk them over at a calm time, and agree one owner per job, start to finish, thinking part included.
Teens version
Exam stress sorts well into three rings: your revision plan is yours, what you ask a teacher for is influence, and the questions on the paper aren’t yours. In a group project, write every step of one job, like booking the room or sending the reminders, and agree one owner.
No one has to share, and passing is always fine. These ideas are for people who are safe with each other. If you are afraid of a partner or of someone at home, see spreadloveandacceptance.com/safety.html. In the US, call 1-800-799-7233 (text START to 88788). In the UK, call the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (free, any time). If you are under 19, Childline is on 0800 1111. If you are struggling to cope, Samaritans is on 116 123. Anywhere else: findahelpline.com.
Free, no sign-up: spreadloveandacceptance.com/groups.html#session-6
After the six sessions
If your group wants to keep going, How it all fits together has a short table of what to reach for when, and Touchstones (the nicknames, jokes and rituals that say “we’re us”) makes a gentle extra session. Everything linked here is free to read, with no sign-up.