WP-09 · Fill-in workpaper
Say it so it lands
A self-check for your own side of a conversation: turn a raw reaction into something the other person can take in, and weigh a message before you react to it.
For relationships where everyone feels safe. If anyone is afraid or controlled, see Not safe at home?
The idea behind it: tune how you send and receive. A mismatch is tuning, not a moral failing. It is one of the site’s Five Pillars, the big ideas everything here is built on.
What you type stays on this device. Nothing you enter in this worksheet is sent anywhere. Nothing is stored unless you turn on “Keep a draft on this device”.
When you're done, download the PDF and keep it somewhere private. “Save” keeps it in this browser for next time. To keep a copy somewhere else, or to send it, use “Draft file” and open that file on this page later. Or download the fillable PDF: type into it in any PDF app or print it, then open it here again to pick up where you left off.
Kept in this browser only, never sent. Best on your own device, not a shared one.
Weighing a message you got? Add context (optional)
The four quick checks go further with context: who they are to you, how they usually write, whether this keeps coming back, and how you’re each doing today. Adding it makes the reading fairer, though it still can’t know everything. It stays on this device and isn’t part of the PDF.
Using a shared computer? When you've downloaded what you need,
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